WiGWAG: Post-election psychotherapy, Kit Kats, Ted Nugent and more

A true Cubs survivor

A Chicago Cubs fan managed to live for the full length of the team’s World Series drought. Mabel Ball died at 108, shortly after the Cubs’ recent victory. She was born two months before the team’s win against the Detroit Tigers in the 1908 World Series.

Wishing for defeat

A school board candidate in Frankenmuth, Michigan, got her wish on Election Day. She lost her bid for one of three four-year terms on the board. Bridget Smith filed to run but subsequently landed a job as city manager in the community 75 miles from Detroit. She campaigned with one message — vote for someone else.

Kit Kat car burglar

After learning via a viral tweet that someone stole a Kit Kat bar from a Kansas State University student’s car, Hershey dispatched a representative to the Manhattan, Kansas, campus to deliver 6,500 Kit Kat bars. The candy thief left a message for the student: “I love Kit Kats so I checked your door and it was unlocked. Did not take anything other than the Kit Kat. I am sorry and hungry.”

Careful what you wish for

A Pennsylvania man got his wish after saying he’d rather die than watch the second two presidential debates and the vice presidential debate. George Norman Davis died Sept. 26, shortly after watching the first round. “At least he is no longer obligated to vote, firmly believing regardless of the outcome, the nation is going someplace in a handbasket,” said his obituary.

Modeling as mannequins

“Black Beatles” by Rae Sremmurd provides the beat to the latest viral video challenge to seize the internet. The “mannequin challenge” involves people posing as mannequins as a camera circles around them. The Dallas Cowboys tackled the challenge, as did the Milwaukee Bucks, Texas Christian, Penn State and Clemson football.

Crotch-grabbing supporter

Trump booster Ted Nugent stole the show at a rally for the president-elect prior to the election. Trump had criticized Jay-Z for his language during a Hillary Clinton concert, but Nugent grabbed his own crotch and shouted, “I got your blue state right here, baby. Black and blue.”

Next time, google it

A South Carolina man’s repeated calls to 911 led to his arrest for resisting police and unlawful use of the emergency service. The 69-year-old man apparently got drunk and called 911 to find out, “How many legs does an octopus have?” Police responded to the man’s home and warned him to only call 911 in an emergency. After police left, the man called 911 to ask whether the Russian alphabet is the same as the English alphabet. For the record, marine experts say an octopus has six arms and two legs. And the Russian alphabet has 33 letters.

Dumb as a Fox viewer

Yet another survey shows Fox News viewers are significantly more misinformed than consumers of news from other sources. The study also shows more exposure to Fox News increases misinformation. The survey was conducted by World Public Opinion, a project managed by the Program on International Policy Attitudes at the University of Maryland.

Post-election psychotherapy

One of the first news releases to reach WiG after the Nov. 8 election came from a publicity rep for a psychoanalyst, who observed, “Your level of stress after the election will correlate with whether your favored candidate won. If your candidate won, your primary stress will be engaging with friends who voted for the other candidate and their emotions. For this person, it is time to reconcile relationships with your friends, family, co-workers and Americans who hold opposite political views. If your candidate lost and your greatest fear of a president wins, you have some big de-stressing to do.” Anyone have any reconciliation stories to report?

Here comes ‘the judge’

A woman facing charges for impersonating a judge in the Chicago area won a judicial election Nov. 8. The law clerk had been fired from her courthouse job and charged with impersonating a judge to preside over traffic cases. The Illinois Supreme Court has temporarily suspended the woman’s law license and she can’t take her seat on the bench unless she’s acquitted of criminal wrongdoing.

Loosely wired

Police say a South Florida man was caught driving naked with electrical wires protruding from his penis. According to a Boynton Beach police report, Kurt Jenkins, 56, drove by a witness and gestured for him to look toward Jenkins’ groin area. The witness said Jenkins then asked him to hop inside, but he declined and called police.