WiGWAG: Dylan, Ronald McDonald, and more

Ode to Dylan

How many songs must a man write down before you can call him a Nobel laureate? The answer, my friend, is at least 522. Bob Dylan on Oct. 13 won the Nobel Prize for literature. Reuters reported gasps and a touch of laughter in the hall when the Swedish Academy announced the honor, but worldwide fans of the American singer-songwriter celebrated the decision. Sing along: “Yes, to dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free.”

Drugged for Trump

A super PAC is airing an attack ad against Donald Trump in battleground states that parodies the Big Pharma commercials peddling drugs. The ad urges women to talk to their doctor about taking Republixan, “a little red pill that relieves the stress, guilt and shame associated with voting for Donald Trump.” Of course, there is no drug that accomplishes this and we advocate a holistic approach — avoid the guilt and shame and vote “with her.”

Reclusive Ronald McD

Now that we’re thinking about clowns, McDonald’s says with the reports of creepy clowns on the rise, Ronald McDonald is keeping a low profile. The company said it is being “thoughtful in respect to Ronald McDonald’s participation in community events” as a result of the “current climate around clown sightings in communities.”

Big and tall

The hubbub in Michigan, though, is over Bigfoot, not clowns. The Detroit Free Press reports that some people think they’ve spotted Bigfoot on a live camera trained on an eagle’s nest in the state. The clip from a camera mounted on a tree near a state fish hatchery shows baby eaglets in the nest while a dark figure walking on two legs moves on the ground below. Idaho State University professor Jeff Meldrum, who studies the Bigfoot legend, says the video is interesting, but “doesn’t offer much by way of compelling evidence.”

Texting zombies

The Grim Reaper is stalking Pittsburgh’s downtown, scaring pedestrians into putting their smartphones away long enough to cross a street or pass others on a sidewalk. The reaper is mingling with zombies, all conveying the same message: “Look Alive.” The Pittsburgh Downtown Partnership invested about $50,000 in the campaign against distracted pedestrians.

Bombs on the beach

The might of Hurricane Matthew apparently led to the discovery of Civil War artifacts on Folly Beach in South Carolina. A bomb squad was called to the shoreline in Charleston County after Civil War cannonballs were found in the sand. The first shots of the Civil War were fired at nearby Fort Sumter in 1861.

No ball and chain

Congratulates to Orange is the New Black star Samira Wiley and show writer Lauren Morelli, who announced their engagement earlier this fall. The pair posted a photo on their Instagram accounts showing them smiling and Wiley flashing a diamond ring. Morelli came out two years ago in an article for Mic, writing that she realized her sexual orientation in her first days on the Netflix series set.

McStadium?

You’ve heard of McMansions? How about McStadium? A lawsuit has been filed over Hawkeye fans’ plan to build a 7,500-square-foot home that is a replica of the University of Iowa’s Kinnick Stadium. Neighbors sued the Iowa City Board of Adjustment after it allowed a couple to proceed with the project. The design includes brick siding and a replica of the press box. Perhaps there’s concern about tailgating?

He’s so vain, ‘dangerously vain’

Carly Simon authorized the use of one her most popular songs, “You’re so Vain,” in an anti-Trump video. She even allowed a tweak. As written, a line in the song is “Your scarf, it was apricot.” But in the anti-Trump video, the line is “Your face, it was apricot.” A spokesman for Simon said she is “alarmed at the prospect of Donald Trump reaching the White House and has joined other creative voices in making a definitive statement.”